Slackers Inc.


Because slacking off can be hard work. Let me do it for you.

Today’s Slackers post is dedicated to Rachel, who posted the most awesome comment on an article I wrote last week! It would be really cool if I could direct you to it but due to evil genius’ on the other side of the planet, unfortunately that is not currently possible. I’ve been hacked! Can you believe that? Well, it wasn’t just me. There were multiple websites that were affected. My friend Lisa’s site was even held for ransom for a short period of time and when she was able to sidestep the pirate’s demands he resorted to hacking into her page once again, only this time instead of demanding payment, he simply took down a post she had written about what a pathetic jerk off he is. (She was actually way more kind in describing him and rather positive about the whole experience in general but that’s not how I roll) At any rate, the post which Rachel commented on, as well as a couple others, have been compromised until later this evening. Still! I didn’t forget you Rachel. I’ve put together a pretty stellar list of links here for you to feast your eyes on instead of doing anything even remotely useful at your job. Enjoy!

Rachel, I don’t know if you’re single or not, but #16 will either take you out for a romantic Valentine’s Day dinner or shoot you in the face.

I agree! Can we please stop referring to our significant others as our best friends? Us girls know this moniker just isn’t accurate. I think I articulated it best when I so elegantly quipped “Best friends tell each other absolutely everything and when mine confesses to me that she’s banging all of her co-workers, I don’t tell her she has a small dick and then throw my hairdryer at her.

I’ve never been before, but I am now solidly Team Hillary.

What if World War I took place in the Facebook era? Oh and also Mathew Perry was there.

If the ancient Mayans were known for doodling it would be because of left over relics like this.

Have you ever wanted to live inside of a Transformer? 

This blew my mind, because Letchworth Village is about ten minutes from where I grew up and I had no idea it was all abandoned and creepy and haunted now!

Yet another winner from my Aunt Barbara. Germans are a strange, strange breed. I should know. I’m one of them.

I always wanted to have a baby stick figure!

Things you can crash into in bike lanes. I feel like I could have made this video.

And finally, here’s a really sweet bonus link. Rachel, if you’ve got fifteen minutes to kill, watch these amazing kid’s reactions to gay marriage.

Soooooo…anyone got anything going on outside the house this weekend? See you in two weeks!


Lazy kitty pic from

  • Damien

    Ah yes, the ‘I’ve been banging such and such’ conversation. Sort of makes you want to bring that person out to, oh, I don’t know…Letchworth Village and just leave them tied up in a basement nook. I mean. Hypothetically.

  • Rachel

    Kelly! You totally made my day!!!!! I cannot believe you dedicated this to me!!!! This is probably the coolest thing ever!! :) (Yes I like excessive use of exclaimation points…)

    • Kelly

      Go ahead and use em’ up Rachel! I like your enthusiasm. Most people preface anything they say to me with “You’re not going to put this on the blog, right?” so it’s nice to have someone be so excited about making an appearance.

  • McGyvra

    I’m Rachel’s co-worker …. and dedicating a post called “Slackers” to her is totally appropriate. (If our boss is reading this, just kidding, Rachel is VERY BUSY working hard all day long). Yes, she is super excited that you wrote this for her b/c she just sent me an IM in ALL CAPS telling me–with lots of exclamation points. This may be the closest thing she gets to being famous….hey – which makes me FRIENDS with someone famous. Awesome!

    • Kelly

      Haha! Fantastic. I love people who are easily distracted at work. This website pretty much wouldn’t exist otherwise. Send all of your co-workers over. If it means getting more traffic, I’ll dedicate a Slackers to your whole company. Anyone who’s been reading this page for any length of time knows I’m quite comfortable in my shamelessness.

  • AwesomelyOZ

    The kitten alone just made my day. Ive been a fan of Hillary, I hope she runs for the next election – I’d be the first in line! That stick figure baby was so freaking adorable but kinda creepy haha great Halloween costume. Have a great weekend -Iva

  • Anna

    I started watching the “kids reaction” video and was like “oh boy”, but I was quite impressed with their answers! Except the one little crapbasket kid, haha.

  • Jenn from Much to my Delight

    I just found your blog via “The Life of Bon” and feel like I just found my blogging soulmate or something. (is that weird? It’s probably weird). Not only am I stoked to find someone writing truly funny and smart content on the interwebs, but I’m also extra excited that you’re 30+ and from QUEENS! New, big fan over here.