Me Vs. My Fire Alarm

alarm

Have you ever been so lazy that the steps you take to avoid doing something end up requiring more energy than had you just fixed the problem in the first place? Welcome to the Mexican stand off between me and my fire alarm. Am I allowed to say “Mexican” these days? I don’t know what’s racist anymore. But ANYWAY it all started about two weeks ago when I was watching TV, minding my own business, and a chirping noise much like the kind you would imagine a winged creature from the jurassic Read More…

Under Pressure: The Perks And Pitfalls

UnderPressure

I once went on a job interview for a production gig that I wanted very badly. Everything was going great until the interviewer asked me if I worked well under pressure. “Oh, definitely.” I began. “I thrive under pressure. In fact, from working behind extremely busy bars for so long, being under pressure is where I’m most comfortable. I mean, I know I’m not here for a bar job, so, I’m not sure why I brought that up exactly, but I assume the level of pressure is around the same. Read More…

The Rheel Daze Is On Hiatus

Hiatus

Right about now (that being 9:38 in the morning) on the day a post is due, I usually find myself scrambling to type as furiously as I can in an effort to deliver it on time. In today’s case it would have been a Weekly Bitch. On Fridays it’s either a Snippet or a Slackers. Mondays I try to do lengthier entries that I’ve taken a significant amount of time to construct. Recently though, I’m finding more and more, that I’m not happy with what I’m putting out. Being a Read More…

I’m Breaking Up With Food

food

Lately it seems as though this blog has become one long Addicts Anonymous meeting, whether it be Chapstickers Anonymous (which actually exists btw) or Gossip Guzzlers Anonymous or the constant mentions of my Diet Coke habit. Jesus, when I see it all written out like that I’m amazed I can still hold a job or pay my rent. (Well…I could hold a job, if I had one that is.) All of those things are in good fun though. However, there’s one particularly nasty relationship that I’ve had for as long as Read More…

Only At The Airport

AirportRag

Around my thirtieth birthday, I decided it was time to kick this filthy little habit I had of reading gossip magazines. I’m not even sure when I started being interested in celebrity culture. I don’t remember buying US Weekly in high school but then I had a boyfriend with a Jeep, so I had better stuff to do. However upon leaving my twenties, I felt I could no longer justify supporting, not only the outrageous amount of attention and importance we place on movie stars but also the insanely invasive Read More…

I’m Addicted To ChapStick

Chapstick

You know the well is running dry when you’re doing posts about ChapStick but according to a friend of mine, ChapStick is one of the most commonly listed items amongst the top five things that women say they can’t live without in their online dating profiles, so I know I’m not alone in this. And I also know I’m probably not alone when I clarify that by “ChapStick” I’m not referring to that particular brand necessarily, but anything from Blistex to Burt’s Bees to YouDaBalm to whatever, so long as Read More…

How To Have An Unproductive Day

Unproductive Day

One of the first posts I ever wrote on this blog was called How NOT To Live Every Day Like It’s Your Last, which basically considered the idea that maybe we all need to chill the fuck out on this notion of constantly “seizing the day”. Every time I see one of those memes on Facebook or Instagram about making the most of my life, I want to remind the author that anyone who was actually out there doing that, would probably be too busy heli-skiing or wreck diving to spend half Read More…

Oops, I Did It Again! I Quit My Job

Quit

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s quitting. Jobs that is. I’ve quit four in the last two years alone. Well, one I got fired from after five days but they simply beat me to the punch by about a week. The other ones, I managed to hang onto for either months or years but it’s always the same with me. I start out really excited about the potential of a place and then slowly, I become frustrated with the way things are run until I’m completely miserable and Read More…

I Bought A Scanner So I Could Scan Things

Printer

Two things are happening right now. One, I’m on vacation and didn’t feel like writing a proper post right before I left and two, I bought a scanner so I could scan things and it’s been sitting in the closet next to my laundry bag for over a month. As I was packing for my trip to Florida and thinking What am I going to put on the site for Friday? it occurred to me that perhaps I could finally bust out my fancy new office equipment and save myself the time of having Read More…

I Know I’m Not Supposed To But I Really Really Really Like Gossiping

Gossip

As much as I miss the days when my DVR was overflowing with Oprah episodes telling me what kind of person I should be, the fact that she’s been off the air for nearly three years now (can you believe that shit? Oprah, come back!) makes me feel like it’s finally safe to talk about some things that in the Winfrey era, just wouldn’t fly. Things that were merely whispers under an “aha! moment” regime which can now be brought to light. In fact, I feel like I could start Read More…