How An Extra Day Off From Work Can Cause You To Have A Complete Mental Breakdown

Enlightened

Recently, due to a scheduling conflict at work, I found myself with an extra day off during the week. Anyone who knows me understands that from my deranged perspective, this is not unlike winning the Powerball. I don’t hate my job or anything, I just don’t like working and I’m more dramatic about having to do it than every other person on the planet. So you can imagine how excited I was when I first heard that I didn’t have to. However the gamut of emotions that I ran through Read More…




Nine Reasons Going To Your Parents’ House Is The Best And One Reason It’s Not

TheRheels

Remember back when going to your parents’ house was a total drag? Mostly because you were a moody twenty-year-old who made everyone miserable? Well now you’re way older and life out there in the real world is hard. Sometimes there’s nothing more comforting than packing a weekend bag and hopping on the train to spend a couple of days with the people whose job it is to love your sorry ass. Here’s why: #1 They Live In A Real House Just look at the size of this place! You know Read More…




Slackers Inc.

LazyWhateverThisIs

Heeeeeeeey! This is what I felt like all August. That lazy whateveritis in the hammock right there. Which is why there hasn’t been a slackers in over a month. But being that it’s September and I’m naturally a complete nerd when it comes to school and text books and pencils and new notebooks and stuff, my internal clock is bellowing right now and I’m all sorts of fired up for homework. So we’re back. With a vengeance. Here’s a super duper slackers just in time to keep you inside, bent Read More…




The Rheel Daze Is All Growns Up!

BirthdayCandles

God, I love birthdays! The food. The drinks. The all-day-long attention on Facebook from people who you are only vaguely familiar with. In fact, I think one of my favorite things about having a blog is the fact that I get to have an internet birthday in addition to my real life birthday, and this is it! As of today The Rheel Daze is one whole year old! Yay!!!!!  Too much? OK, well maybe. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t a lot of exciting things going on around here. My little Read More…




Listen To An Esthetician Part II: A Whole Lotta Awesome Makeup To Put On Your Face

Makeup

First of all, I should probably disclose that since I work in laser hair removal, in my case, being an esthetician doesn’t really make me any more of an authority on makeup than you are. I just thought it sounded good. What does make me an authority on makeup though, is the fact that I’m pathetically vain and will try almost anything if it means having just one person compliment me on my eyebrows. The amount of crap I’ve sifted through over the years in an attempt to look airbrushed Read More…




Five Things I Would Do Differently If I Was Younger

YoungKelly

Ah, hindsight. Is there anything more useless? You go and do a bunch of nonsense and then say to yourself “Well in hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have done that” yet there you are anyway, having already done the bullshit you weren’t supposed to do, so what’s the use? I try to avoid hindsight at all costs. Reflecting upon my mistakes only stresses me out. It gives me those creases you get around the eyes from cringing too much and I feel like if I’m in a perpetual state of having Read More…




Just Say No! To Bridal Showers

Invitation

Every year around February it starts. The invites begin to roll in. The elegantly scripted notes that remind you to “Save the date” or the carefully crafted Etsy birds perched on branches that chirp at you to “Join in the revelry”. One after another, they pile up, a virtual “cha-ching” sounding off as each is deposited into your mail box. Your mouth goes dry. You begin to sweat as the dollar signs start adding up in your head. And then there are more. By June, you’ve attended a number of Read More…




How Do I Get My Neighbors To Stop Having So Much Sex?

MyNeighborsAreHavingTooMuchSex-590x250

Soooo, a number of months ago, I started to notice a pattern developing in the space directly above my living room. A couple of nights a week, around seven P.M., a slow rumbling would begin to take place. It was nothing spectacular initially and for the first thirty minutes or so, I mostly ignored it. However it lasted a long time. Over the span of an hour or more it would intensify and subside until ultimately it progressed into a chaos which transformed my apartment into a scene similar to Read More…




Slackers Inc.

LongPause

It is possible that I scrap looking for pics for Slackers on the internet all together and simply photo source images of Vanna’s ridiculous cat Simon from now on. She sent me this one with the caption “Why the long pause…” If you’ve never heard that joke, it’s hilarious. A polar bear walks into a bar and orders a rum……..and coke. The bartender says “Why the big pause?” Haha! I die every time I hear it. Anyway, Vanna put the punch line to very good use in my opinion. Hey, Read More…




My TONY Subscription Is Stressing Me Out: Socrates Sculpture Park

ParkEntrance

To see why TONY is stressing me out, look here. As if going to a park isn’t boring enough, now I’m asking you to read about one. That’s right, it’s time for another installment of my quest to see whether it’s ever worth it to leave the house and this month I chose a sculpture garden, so fasten your seat belts. At the very least this post will have a whole bunch of pretty pictures and I know a lot of you like that so here goes: Time Out New Read More…